G.L.Piggy [at] gmail.com
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I’ve expounded on gym guys in the past, pointing out that older dudes tend to exhibit bizarre behavior when around dumbells and weights. There are other gym guy specimens I left out.
One obnoxious strain of gym guy I came across today is the “personal trainer by default”. He’s a guy that has been working out for a little while, knows where things are in the gym, brings a couple of newbies to the arena, and proceeds to act as if he wrote the tour de force on the subject of bodybuilding.
In reality, he’s a schlub that’s just a little less schlubby than the schlubs under his tutelage. They follow him around dotingly, hanging on every piece of advice he has to offer. I understand why the new guys feel this way; I’ve been there too. As a new guy at a new gym, you don’t want to get in the way, look stupid, or drop something on your throat. New guys walk with trepidation as they gain their gym legs. The problem is completely with the gung ho wannabe-trainer. He takes his task too seriously. He charges around the gym, weaving in between workout stations and squat racks, looking for new exercises to introduce his pupils to. “OK guys, lets do some dips,” he’ll say as he mounts the dip station and proceeds to do quarter dips before his triceps start to quivering.
The new guys seem to know that their leader is sort of a joke, but they’re in no position to question his teachings. “What do you know about bent-over rows? Huh?” is the feared response to any affront of his authority.