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Rex Ryan’s Beta Tat

With one hugely beta tattoo, New York Jets head coach Rex Ryan broke several tat rules.  The New York Daily News has a picture of Ryan with a tattoo of his wife wearing a Jets jersey with Mark Sanchez’s number on it.  Reminds us of the story about Ryan and his wife’s foot fetish.

rex-ryan-tattoo

The three rules broken with this one tattoo:

1.  An extension of the rule to not get a significant others’ name tatt’d on your body (because relationships are fleeting) is to also avoid their inked likeness.

2.  The same goes for the quarterback in question.  Mark Sanchez is no Tom Brady, and he was already benched during the season.  His days as a Jet are numbered.

3.  Ryan should have already been fired from the Jets.  We have no reason to believe that he’ll last all that long.

Think of this scenario:  Mark Sanchez continues to suck which causes the Jets continue to suck which leads to Rex Ryan’s firing which causes his wife to divorce him.  One hopes that after Ryan gets fired and then lands another coaching job that his new employer will finance his tattoo removal surgery.

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21 Responses to Rex Ryan’s Beta Tat

  1. anonymous 01/04/2013 at 10:31 am

    On the other hand, think about how bad Tony Romo sucks, and there’s rarely if ever talk of him getting benched or leaving the cowboys

  2. C.R. 01/04/2013 at 10:35 am

    i must have missed the picture of jason garrett’s or jerry jones’s Romo tat.

  3. Saint Louis 01/04/2013 at 10:38 am

    Funny that some retard’s tattoo is apparently bigger news than three cops getting shot.

  4. Tank 01/04/2013 at 10:54 am

    1. Cops getting shot is nothing new.

    2. Ryan could move to another team with a QB who wears number 6. Solved.

  5. SOBL1 01/04/2013 at 10:55 am

    Why does her arm look like a warner bros cartoon drawing of a giant cooked bird, like when someone in the jungle or on a deserted island would see a bird character and start drooling? Look at her arm, it’s weird because the legs look human. This is bad idea jeans all around and frickin omega.

    Saying Romo sucks is comical considering his numbers and team’s success. Sanchez would kill for one of Romo’s years.

  6. asdf 01/04/2013 at 11:31 am

    “Funny that some retard’s tattoo is apparently bigger news than three cops getting shot.”

    U mad?

  7. nikcrit 01/04/2013 at 11:56 am

    I know they’ve been popularized and have become much more mainstream in the last fifteen years. But I still contend that whether or not one has a tat is still a clear delineator of social class.

  8. peterike 01/04/2013 at 12:07 pm

    But I still contend that whether or not one has a tat is still a clear delineator of social class.

    What he said. I don’t care how mainstream they are, they are still a prole marker.

  9. youngreact 01/04/2013 at 12:16 pm

    “What he said. I don’t care how mainstream they are, they are still a prole marker.”

    No way. Think about all those middle-class girls in their late teens and early 20′s who get butterflies and cursive writing on their hips, ankles, and the backs of their shoulders. Not prole at all.

  10. rivsdiary 01/04/2013 at 12:22 pm

    Holy shit this is cuckold territory.

  11. SOBL1 01/04/2013 at 12:36 pm

    @rivsdiary – Di you ever read the wife swap advertisement written by Rex and his wife? Rex and Mrs. Ryan were involved with wife swapping websites, especially foot fetish ones, and Rex even enjoys knowing his lady is getting pleased by another man.

  12. The Anti-Gnostic 01/04/2013 at 1:20 pm

    I don’t care if you’re Mitt Romney’s son or daughter–getting a tat is pure prole. The fact that middle class soccer moms have them is just further evidence of broad cultural decline. (Men don’t have as much invested in their looks so they can maybe get away with one. Maybe.)

    As a practical matter, ladies, that ink that looked so great on your tanned, tight, 20-yo bikini body will NOT when you’re 40-years old and your hips have spread, your boobs and butt are sagging, and your skin is splotchy and inelastic. This happens to EVERYBODY–even that subtle little script or butterfly will look ridiculous. And you can increase the ridiculousness exponentially for every centimeter.

    It’s as if somebody cursed you with wearing the fake tiara you ran around in when you were a child for the rest of your life.

  13. nick digger 01/04/2013 at 5:07 pm

    The tat seems unfinished. His wife is on all fours, so maybe he couldn’t decide which black player to ink in behind her.

  14. S_McCoy 01/04/2013 at 9:16 pm

    Former Treasury Secretary George Schultz has a tiger tattoo on his ass from his marine days. I have a couple not visible tattoos from the early 80′s, I contend that time was the end period for when tattoos were genuinely anarchic. It was the REsearch Modern Primitive era but there was some overlap with the dolphin on the foot period. I don’t think these are prole markers. The tattoos of the Yakuza aren’t exactly prole markers either. Of course few want the gg allen type tattoos either.

    That said, there is something seriously wrong with a society that has a tattoo parlor on every corner and when the alledged best of the country are covered in tattoos. There’s something pathetic about the look at me ethos it signals. I honestly look down on 99% of the women I see with tattoos, which is most women today, yet an Ani DiFranco type chick with the tattoos, I don’t necesarily look down on.

    I’ve noticed more women tattooing the name of a dead person, almost always a child, prevalent with the wogs I think. I always think how arrogant this person is, everyone she meets must bow down to her because her kid died, maybe you got a dead kid too but you don’t love the kid as much else you’d get a tattoo.

    Schultz and my type tattoos are ultimately okay, they’re there as an expression of our risk embracing natures or at least a desire to embrace risk and we don’t advertise it, this is good. The yakuza tattoos are to indicate membership in a family and again, they aren’t really visible, so that’s good. The tattoos we see today on athletes, actors, soldiers, housewifes, etc, they indicate a conformity because they are visible and a certain mindset based on fear of ones self.

    I could never consider Ryan as a leader to take seriously just like I couldn’t take a gay seriously as a leader

  15. Robert the Wise 01/05/2013 at 5:53 am

    “The tattoos of the Yakuza aren’t exactly prole markers either.”

    The customs of cowardly Japanese gangsters have nothing to do with class distinctions of the West. I call them cowardly because cowards always join gangs. A real man does not fear to walk the streets alone.

    There are only three types of people who should have tattoos:

    1. Military/Merchant Marine

    2. Grass hut-dwelling tribal primitives.

    3. total losers

  16. Rifleman 01/05/2013 at 6:24 am

    peterike 01/04/2013 at 12:07 pm
    But I still contend that whether or not one has a tat is still a clear delineator of social class.

    What he said. I don’t care how mainstream they are, they are still a prole marker.

    Of course. Tattoos = trash

    With one hugely beta tattoo,..

    This is NOT beta behavior, this is omega prole behavior.

    Beta is just normal. The average sports coach in America is a classic beta male. Married, kids, church attending, mortgage, responsible, little league dad. Normal, pudgy, American beta male.

    Don’t confuse beta with perverted, submissive, pathetic males.

    It’s amazing how many White guys online have decided to use beta as an insult as if they are something better and beta is beneath them. Most guys who use the term beta as an insult are omega or low end beta males who are too lacking in self awareness to figure that out.

  17. Podsnap 01/05/2013 at 7:56 am

    People use the ‘beta’ with the implication that they are ‘alpha’.

    I think the whole methodology is bullshit. Never use a word on the net that you would be embarrassed to use in real life.

  18. jbaee 01/05/2013 at 12:55 pm

    “The three rules broken with this one tattoo:

    1. An extension of the rule to not get a significant others’ name tatt’d on your body (because relationships are fleeting) is to also avoid their inked likeness.

    2. The same goes for the quarterback in question. Mark Sanchez is no Tom Brady, and he was already benched during the season. His days as a Jet are numbered.

    3. Ryan should have already been fired from the Jets. We have no reason to believe that he’ll last all that long.”

    I disagree it breaks the first rule. He’s already married to her (so the “relationships are fleeting” boat has already sailed), but by inking her in a sexualized pose, he’s permanently objectifying her on his body.

    On the other hand, getting that sexualized pose associated with a specific man who is famous and close to the family is fucking insane. If he wanted his wife in a jets jersey, use no number or some high number that nobody wears.

  19. nikcrit 01/05/2013 at 2:42 pm

    “Ryan should have already been fired from the Jets.”

    Quickly off-topic, but it is wild-card weekend:
    Yeah, it’s truly amazing that Ryan didn’t get fired after the Jets debacle of season. Yet they fired Luvie Smith, who gave the Bears a winning record, and what’s-his-name, Turner, from the Chargers, who was more deserving but still less-so than Ryan.

    I think Ryan is maintained by the front office because he’s good copy and understands the hype and how to feed the New York-media machine. But that may be changing; at some point he has to deliver at least aspirational results.

    RE. the tat specifically; it’s gross; I too think it borders on cuckoldry-like motivations; I’m reflexively uncomfortable with it to the point that I can’t cleanly analyze the impulse; tho in some way Rex clearly ain’t separatin’ the sexual from the familial!

  20. Trouble 01/05/2013 at 2:57 pm

    Sanchez will be hard to trade (contract). The Jets are a joke.

  21. Rifleman 01/06/2013 at 5:39 pm

    Nothing beta about it. He just went full omega, individual omega and racial omega:

    James Harden is a tattoo now.

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